to prove a point

since i was bored with economics, and since coincidentally i was talking to someone deeply interested in the topic, i looked up what being in the air force involved.

i realised that i can still be a pilot, since the cut-off age is 27, which leaves me just enough time to join the air force immediately after my bond ends. now before anyone tries to strangle me (wth are u doing in the airforce with an oxford degree dammit?!) i'm quite sure physically i will survive the training. and more importantly, i think this is very "me" isn't it? sounds like something lixin would do. i go for adrenaline/endorphin rushes, and other than being a stuntwoman or an acrobat, i doubt anything could be more physically demanding.

i wanted to join the armed forces because i want something both physically and mentally challenging. ok i admit i will hardly be able to exercise the grey matter in my head if i were really in the army (definitely not as much as now), but the mental strain comes in a different form. and i suppose it's also to prove a point. like girls can be as good as guys, even if it takes more effort to get there. it's also to push myself to my limits -- i honestly am not hard enough on myself when it comes to physical stuff, especially the running bit. i always always run at a comfortable pace, and that hardly is the way to improve. i hope this doesn't come off as being sadistic, but i really want to see how much strain my body can take (ideally without breaking down).

having said that i could push myself to the limits without making it my career. i can start training now, winter nonewithstanding, for a marathon at the end of this year. and possibly join taekwondo or boxing. throw in a few bungee jumps, and some rides on a rollercoaster and i should get my endorphin/adrenaline fix for the year, right?

hmmmmmmm...