steam

for everyone who's been disillusioned with their results...

to quote alex, it is the last stretch. yup. it's been a long way, from psle when i was not sure what at all i was doing or studying so hard for, and didn't even look at the booklet they gave, to o levels when i remember pacing up and down all night in an effort to memorise biology, to now the big As when i do odious maths papers every day.

i was disappointed with my prelim results. barnard assured me they were "all right", but i think it's not my best, certainly not. yes, i've had doubts about my best, whether it's just and merely mediocre, but i look deep inside, something vehemantly objects to accepting this defeatist attitude.

my kor told me to put in effort. i think applying for scholarships and even oxford is just an absolute waste of time at times, but i agree with his reasoning. if i think i've played badly, putting in effort for this short 1 month will not kill me, if i do as badly for As, i lose nothing at all, if i do well, great, scholarships and oxford are now more possible.

just try for this 1 month. try your best. you have nothing to lose.