i have a "phat" baby nephew! so abiel calls him. well he is fat. very very fat. i've only just seen photos of him, and this perhaps provides some perspective.


no prizes for guessing which he is. i bought a really cute top for him that said, "chicks dig me" but it's for 6-9month old babies, and looking at his three-month old frame now i think he can't wear it. oh well. it's on its way to singapore now anyway, too late that i saw his photos. my goodness honestly. if i had a baby this size i don't know what i'd do! (his birth weight btw is >4.5kg) but he does look cute. i have pictures of my cousins carrying him, and you can see her muscle definition quite clearly.


well here is another thing i have missed. i missed 21st birthdays, wedding dinners x 2 and now an addition to the family. it sometimes makes me wonder if it's worth it. one of my cousins, who has always been pretty, has now blossomed to become really really pretty. in fact make that two. i can't say i am surprised, i suppose i just wasn't expecting it all to happen when i am not around.

and now IE has come back to me to say that they have approved my masters application. now this is vague, simply because i don't know if they've essentially signed a carte blanche for me to do my masters, or if i still have to get a first. (nigh on impossible if i don't start revising soon!) but this provides motivation. i was glad to hear my parents happy to hear the news - my dad even said it's better than him winning the lottery, which seriously, given what he dreams about doing with lottery money, means a great deal to me. it makes me glad that they don't mind me studying abroad for another year, but in a way i was looking forward to going home, finally. it's been very long. but there are too many buts for me to want to leave by this year - abiel is here, my friends are here, and i really want to start my career on an equal footing with my friends, so we can gripe about the same things and all. as it is, i will be the first among my cousins who are about my age to start working, and i don't want to run out of things to do or say to them.

abiel said i should get an interest. you know i always thought i had a lot of them, but aside from exercise i don't actually have any. not exactly reading unless these are frivolous magazines, and i don't think you can call that an interest. perhaps its archeology or cosmology, but these are so impractical that i've weened myself off books on this a long time ago. travel. perhaps, yes. but i think it's got to do with my love of glossy pictured books, just like how i love cookery books (though i seldom read them! they make my tummy ache in hunger :S the pains of not having a kitchen) hm.

i don't really want to be those people who live their lives in others', you know what i mean? i can see myself living my life for my children and husband, and that is scary. where will i be then?